Nemain. She has been with me all of my life. But it took me the greater part of my life to understand that she actually enters and share my body. It was not until I understood the spirit world better that I felt very different on occasions. I felt like a Goddess, naked, clean and always youthful and blithe. And I felt like this whenever I went to a sacred space for worship. It never mattered which or where the house of worship was located: a field, a Jewish Temple, Mormon Temple Grounds and their wards, an ancient Buddhist Temple in China, Old European Catholic Cathedrals, outdoor wedding space, Wiccan circle. Anywhere where people gather to worship she is there, in me and with me. And I have felt comfortable in any religious gathering. It does not mean I enjoyed every part of their leaders’ sermon. But I would tell you that I whole heartedly felt comfortable and that I belonged. I figure that Nemain must have come first as she is the Goddess of Sacred Space and the Sacred Grove. Nemain was there before they built the buildings. She was the presence of the land that called the people to gather.
This is how I first came to know her. Her gentle maiden aspect of Holy Reverence. I think many people would be/have been a bit taken aback that one of the aspects of Morrigan could come across so gentle, almost benign. I have been told to “watch out” she is a “Trickster Goddess”. One of Nemain’s aspects maybe the Trickster. Afterall, her main animal is the Crow/Raven. However, that is not the relationship I have with her. On occasion, we will be co-conspiriters – but that is the extent of it. She may well be the Trickster with other people like a Loki or Coyote. But that is just not the relationship that I have with her. I find that Gods have very, very complex relationships with us that are uniquely individual. After layers and layers of lifetimes with us how could our relationships be anything but complex?
She is also “The Frenzied Havoc of War”. To be honest I had a difficult time seeing her in this title until my meeting with the Crow. In that meeting I felt the frenzy and fury of her animal totem/symbol/familiar. I felt the power and the marriage of the spirit world and the mundane world brought together in anger and grief and anticipation. And in the center of this chaos, calm, levelheaded, grounded thought. And I understand this is just a tiny tip of the power that she can muster.
She is a “Lover” and “Protector”. In my relationship with Nemain, she is a consort to Bela-Tu-Cadros the God of War. In Springtime, where sacred water meets green clover she comes into me and transports me to a different time. I will be standing in a grove or meadow ringed with trees. Naked and lighted. Different people will see me and usually ask one of two things. They will either be people fleeing before a war asking for protection. In that case, I will give them a rule or two to follow and then tell them that they have the protection of the forest and to go to my Sacred Grove and directions on how to find it. The other request I get is from soldiers. They ask me to ask my husband that they may “win in battle or to die well.” When they ask this of me they will then lay something at my feet. Usually its flowers but sometimes it is something different. After being seen my a handful of people, I will return to myself in my time and my place. I have been doing this work with Nemain for about two years now. Ever since I started to worship with her in my sacred space regularly. This particular work only happens in the Springtime. She is the Maiden, the Springtime, the Waxing Moon.
She is a “Sacred Whore”. However, I am not. Not in my mundane /body of flesh at least. I know that my spiritual/Otherworldly form is one that can be convinced to do this type of worship. When my spiritual relationship with Gods and Spirits is sexual I have come to understand that it is through Nemain that I have come to know them.
Nemain is a Dark Goddess. Nemain works with transitions of life to death. Crows and battlefields, the Frenzied Havoc of War these are her domains. Witchcrafting with banishment, cursing, transitions brings her to me naked and cloaked in black. The vision of a Priestess of Death or of intense power comes to mind. When I feel in my witching power as dark, dangerous, sexual and a storm of intensity it is her with me. This aspect of Nemain is so very different in feel from the Goddess of the Sacred Grove – yet it is her all the same. In this form she is much more recognizable as an aspect of the Morrigan.
These are the aspects of Nemain that I interact with/that she works with me on. I have not found very much on the internet about her. And some of what I did find did not resonate with my relationship with her. The only one I can recommend is from “RainbowPagan” on Youtube:
Part One: Nemain lesson by RainbowPagan on YouTube
Part Two: Nemain lession by RainbowPagan on youTube